I liked your paper overall. You told me what I need to know about the paper and the writer and touched on some of the key points that were required for this assignment. You have a very strong piece of writing and it is also a touchy subject. And that would mean that there should be a little more analysis on the appeals. You briefly mentioned the appeals ethos, pathos, and logos, but you did not really tell me when it was used and how and why it worked for this article. If you went a little further on the analysis of why it is all three of the appeals your paper would be a lot stronger. I did like the summary of the article and helped me have a better understanding of what was going on. But I believe if you would have added in the rhetorical devices to explain this article, your paper would have been a lot better than it already is and definitely much stronger.
Hannah Singleton:
You and I share this article in common, but we took
different stances on it. I see your point and you make them sound pretty clear
to me. You wrote a very strong and clear easy that shows that it should go in
the second chapter rather than the first. You did well with applying what we
learned in class into your paper and you made sure that it was not dry paper. It
was interesting to read and put some things into prospective for me. Granted we
are supposed to write to the “imaginary editors of a book” but I also took into
account of the “other” readers would feel about the chapter. I totally agree
that men should strive to be better since women are doing better, but I do not
fully agree with her argument. There are more jobs and opportunities then there
were back then and as for the men themselves, without the diversity the world
would be bland. So I chose this article because it was funny and I see that you
chose it for similar reasons. I enjoyed reading your paper and it gave me some
insight as to how I could better my own paper. So thank you for that.
This is a well written essay. You identify the different techniques and explain why each are used. The argument made in this article may be subjective as it is probably going to be split fifty fifty or maybe less, however, it does contain some good arguments in which you capitalize and explain the legitimacy of the argument. I chose the article of how violent video games may contribute to aggression in children, and both contain real life situations and facts that help prove the author's argument. I also found it good that you are talking to a specific editor and telling them where to put the article. If there is anything to improve on, it would be to further explain the effectiveness on how the author uses pathos logos and ethos.
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